You feel safe. Looked after. Quiet. At ease. It´s a moment in time when you can open a parenthesis in the rush of life. Especially business life! That is what I call my refuge, my safe place. Not necessarily physical. In fact, in my case it’s imaginary. It may be in a chosen spot, may summon it with closed eyes or connect through a special melody or breath! The trigger is up to you. What is important, is that you have one. As a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) “down time” is vital, key to face the daily demands. Because of the broad spectre & depth of perception and how we process, our nervous system gets easily overwhelmed. The more you perceive, the more you will need to manage and handle. There is a wide variety of activities that serve the purpose of giving us the “safe place” treat. Let me take you through some which have worked wonders for me in my corporate years, and towards the end I will share what best works for me now as a self-employed working mom.

Meditate

I can not stress enough the importance, the NEED of meditation. You may already be meditating and still believe you “don´t know how to”. To meditate is basically to focus, concentrate on something (thought, nature, painting, mantra, melody, activity, etc.) in order to tame your mental state, and CONNECT. To whom? To you. The you you. The “you” many call the “true self” or “inner voice”. How on earth can we otherwise listen with so much noise going on and on? High sensitivity probably means you record every single sound around you. In a world that rarely slows down, that could mean, if we allowed it, constant buzz. I will soon share some tools to help you start meditating! For now, try out playing a mantra with noise-cancelling headphones, while you solely focus on breathing in, and breathing out. If you are lucky enough to find a quiet spot, you may prefer to turn off the music. Sometimes even that is too much. One of my favorite mantras is “om ama rani”.

Walk. Or Dance.

Get moving. Your body will benefit, and so will your mind. Give it a break by moving. Better still if this happens in nature (at least being able to breath fresh air, look at sooome green). Whatever gets you moving bi-laterally, will work as brain gym. An easy way to do this naturally is to imitate your kid, play with him, that´s what I am doing lately. Children do these movements naturally as they grow (crawling, walking). Dancing is a great alternative, especially to focus even more on something that takes your mind away from (all) the stimuli related to stressful affairs, like a deadline! Or whether you will be able to deliver it to the extreme level of perfection you might usually aspire to 😉

Just. Close. Your. Eyes. And breath.

I have gone through soooo many days, long working days, 8-10-12hs almost non-stop, hopping from meeting to meeting, to email, to calls. Without stopping. Checking my phone as I was doing, well, anything. STOP. You will not lose your job for taking 3-5 minutes. In my early working days I would justify my stopping by explaining that I deserved the same break people who went out for a smoke had! That’s sad… having to account for taking care of one self (These excuses were solely for my judging mind mostly).

The best way to connect to your safe place is to close your eyes and breath.

As simple as that. Insight comes when you do this, or a subtle sensation that may give you a hint of some pain or desire or bright idea! Our refuge is not only that place where we feel safe (basically because we feel heard, contained), but also also it’s a way to tap into our creative self.

Write. Note to self.

Finally, there’s writing. Easily done on the same computer where you work, or jotting down some thoughts on your notebook. Take a couple minutes and let go of what’s in your racing mind. Actually giving your thoughts their place in writing, soothes the mind. Nothing fancy. Just write. It will help take of the more shallow thoughts away, and go deeper into that peace we can only find within you.

Actually, I have many more, which I will cover on following posts! Let me know if interested in me expanding on any of the above tools. And remember to check out the guide for preparing difficult conversations, its Free and can help practice some of these techniques.